The Crazy Suburban Mom: 2011-10-16

Friday, October 21, 2011

Granny Panties Past

     I drove my son to a friend's house last Saturday.  I was hassled and it was early so I grabbed the keys, stepped into flip-flops, and ran out the door in my pajamas.

     Besides the flip-flops and shooting-star flannel pajama pants, I wore an inside-out puke yellow nightshirt. On the way out I checked in with the mirror and decided I was presentable for this circumstance because:

a. I wasn’t getting out of the car.
b. The trip would take less than 15 minutes.
c. The night shirt looked like a T-shirt (albeit an inside-out T-shirt) and the chances of someone seeing my shooting star bottoms were practically nil if I maintained the speed limit.

The ride was uneventful. I listened to talk radio and the boy, his iPod. Someone on the radio was complaining. The sun was in my eyes. People tried to pass me for no other reason then they (thought they) could.  I looked in my rear view mirror to see which idiot was going to try next and that’s when it happened. 

Instead of seeing the cars behind me; I saw Grandma. But not the Grandma with perfect nails and freshly pressed attire; Grandma, the day she opened her apartment door wearing  underwear and holding an enema bag.

     It was (way back) when I was eighteen. Grandma always had maple walnut ice cream and my mother didn’t, so Grandma's was a good place to drive after school. I knocked like always anticipating nothing but cold mapley goodness, instead I was greeted with Grandma and her enema bag saying, "Tracy! Good, you can help me with something."

I (stunned to near unconscious) just wanted to rewind my life to a week ago last Friday, "Uh, that’s okay, you look,"-- Pause a minute from the story. Believe me when I tell you I was struggling for the next word--  "...Busy?"

  My horror at this point (Although, unless you've seen granny panties with you're actual Granny inside them, it's probably pointless but do you're best.) was total.  

I had never seen my Grandma in her underwear before, a fact I was way more then good with. Just about then things she said to me over the years came to me in a gross misfortune of memory. Stomach ache? You need a good physic... (Her word for laxative.) Headache. Physic. Confused? Get yourself a Physic.

 " Got to move those bowels", she would say."

     So between the tumbling memory of all that was physic, the enema bag staring at me and Grandma standing in her open doorway practically naked, I was on overload.  I guess I started backing away from the door because  Grandma and her bag laughed at me, "Don’t be silly, come in." 

 And with that Grandma walked into her kitchen, which was right inside the front door, where she resumed defrosting her freezer.

With the enema bag.

     I never forgot the day of my Granny in Granny Panties and I've thought about it a lot.

 I don't want to; it’s just hard visual to forget.

  But there she was the other day, in my rear view mirror, smiling, nodding, pointing to an enema bag and it was more then a bit scary until I realized she had come to save me from going farther down that slippery slope she herself had gone down all those years before.

Think about it...

     How is it that one day going out without mascara is unthinkable? And the next day (or next week, or year…They all sort of run together) the only mascara you have on is what’s left under your eyes from the night before?  

How does acceptable public attire go from looking hot, to presentable, to at least I'm clean, to.... Well, no one is going to see my shooting star pajama pants anyway.

 And take it from me, when going out in your shooting star pajamas becomes okay you're so far down the slope you need divine intervention from The Ghost of Granny Panties Past.

I just showed you the next step and it’s not pretty. 



October Favorites - Random Drugstore Buys

My whole family uses this and has since  I reviewed it ages ago.   I didn't know what to expect but I was game ...  First you brush your teeth, then rinse and spit and oh,  spitting is where the drama happens. 

 I would love to show you the array of Barbie-pink bits that come out but yeah,  gross.  I'm an adult - You'd think I brush well (and I do) but I still have Barbie-pink fall out.

I gave Ben the green one ( at the time the Batman version ) and he had Batman green shrapnel in the sink so,  he was (and still is) all in too.   He loves the flavor, not crazy-minty or painful but your mouth feels totally fresh after.

They changed the formula a few months so it stopped shipping sadly, and I watched it disappear off the shelves. I hear it's shipping again and I can't wait to be able to find it because seriously I don't know who misses this more; me or my twenty year old.  

This isn't just for little kids.   

Suave makes a terrific 'clinical strength' deodorant.   It's as good or better then all the rest I've tried for about a quarter of the price.  Suave costs about $2.50 for  2.6 oz (74 g)  and the others vary.... but the one I used to buy is typical at $10  for 1.6 oz (45 g).    That's a crazy $100 a pound.  I don't even know what to say about that... 

The main clinical ingredient is the same as all the rest (pretty much) and  Suave  has 20% which is the same strength as most of the others.  Some have a bit less, some do have more but 20% seems to be odor/wetness grenade enough for me.  

*FYI there are several versions and scents: Fresh Aerosol Powder Invisible,  Solid Wild Cherry Blossom, Invisible Solid Powder Aerosol, Tropical Paradise Invisible Solid, Pacific Breeze Invisible Solid, Sweet Pea & Violet Invisible Solid, Fresh Invisible Solid, Powder Roll On, Clinical Protection PRO, solid in Powder Fresh, Suave Cocoa Butter Invisible Solid,Suave Wild Cherry Blossom Clinical Protection

I tried this when it was on sale at Rite-Aid and I love it.  It's something I use on my hair wet and dry and I think it's improved my hair even on the days I don't use it.   It's was $7.99  I bought the only version they had which was version meant for "fine, brittle, and delicate textured hair".   I should to try the EXTRA version for course hair and will as soon as I can find that puppy.

And there is a whole line I've yet to explore....

Because the sale was buy one Organix get one half off I tried this too....

You  shake this first first to mix it it's magical parts.  I love the smell and love how my skin feels after I use it.  I'll definitely repurchase this as I've used it every day since I got it.  

It's considered a 'dry' spray because (if you shake first) it doesn't make your skin greasy, it's like magic. The description on the site is: Indulge your senses with this seductively scented blend of coconut milk and lotus flowers to nourish and refresh your skin, along with dandelion to stimulate and detoxify, while whisking you away to a tropical paradise with just a few sprays.

And I have to agree with all that, tropical paradise it is....but I'm a sucker for coconut.

The one drawback is because of the shape of the bottle it is awkward to use.  I'm not sure why but shaking and then spraying is just difficult and takes more hands then I have.  I need to get another bottle to transfer this heavenly stuff into so the whole experience will be wonderful (and won't involve random expletives)  This was $9.99

For bargain hunter - Starting October 23, 2011 Rite-Aid is have a buy one get onee FREE on the Organix products so I'll be stocking up as soon as they open for stocking stuffers!

*With the exception of the first bottle of Smart Rinse everything was purchased by me.*


Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Wordless Wednesday; Pet version


Spending diet

Recently I purchased my first (retail) Filofax since the 80's only to be called shortly thereafter by the store, We're not selling them anymore; did we forget to take them off the website??? Well, crap-cakes and falala on us...

No, crap-cakes and falala on me...  I'll never find a half price new one like that again. Shoot.

I've decided that was divine intervention and I'm going to go on that 'Spending Diet' I've talked about before.

The rules are:

1.   For now, it's just me on the diet; no one else in the family has to do this.  This is just for my personal discretionary spending.  
2.   It will last until November 16th, 2011.  
3.   Things like prescription medicine, Doctors...Vets.... Oh, I don't know - Maxi-pads....  are not on the diet, things like nail polish, lip balm and hand lotion are (No matter how dry my lips and hands are...)

And Filofax's are on it, for DEF sure!

I will update when I find out what the rules of a spending diet really are.  I'm not sure how this will work because I don't spend a lot but I want to do it anyway.  


Wordless Wednesday

Vintage electric alarm clock by popcornfeet

Found this at an family run estate sale not that long ago


Tuesday, October 18, 2011

You Filo-Tease!

I bit the bullet and ordered an A5 Filofax and all was well with the world - Until the store called two days later and told me, that Filofax should never have been listed; they don't have it... Haven't had it in a really long time...  And aren't getting anymore Filofax's.   Ever.

There was no Cherry Red Classic A5 available for $75, it was all just an awful tease.

I just -- deflated.

I don't know what to do about it because it  took me forever to finally say, I'm ordering an A5 ( than this one was half-price and leather; a nice one. ) A lot of new Filofax's aren't as nice as my old Portland Personal...

Portland filofax and cross pen

...With it's soft cushy leather and ability to lay flat on it's back.

Or even my new Pocket Bloomsbury...

filofax pocket bloomsbury and pen

...Which although brand new ($7.50 on eBay) , lays flat and is leather; inside and out.

I can keep using the personal although I find note - taking difficult.  I wish there was paper with larger line spacing, that might help but it wouldn't be that practical.  Bigger spaces equals more pages equals and even fuller book.  

The pocket is too small for an agenda although once I added a plastic credit card insert (thanks to a hole punch) it makes a pinkly fabulous wallet!

pocket bloomsbury filofax

A close up of the mini - filofax hack...
pocket bloomsbury filofax credit card holder

... Mini because really, it's not much of a hack as far as hacks go.  If there was a nice long pocket for dollars in the Bloomsbury it would be perfect; I'll rate this as quasi-perfect and just give it a go as a wallet/note jotter.

Finding a good use for it has taken a bit of the sting out of losing my A5, but just a bit.

But least I've stopped crying big ol' A5 sized tears....


The October 2011 Favorites continue with Nail Polish

Shopping for Nail Polish has the same appeal as shoe and purse shopping; whether I'm bloated  is of no consequence therefore it's never a self-esteem grenade like the mother of all Prozac inducing moments, bathing suit shopping.

I've bought a metric ton of  happy, happy-moment inducing nail stuff over the summer.  Some I loved, some I gave away but bad nail polish is a lot like bad pizza; it's still better then looking at yourself swallowing a too small bathing suit bottom from behind in fitting room three-way mirror. To begin in no special order (except the first thing...)

I don't know what's in this stuff but it's amazing and more then a top-coat.  It not only dries fast but it seems to dry the polish underneath - I'm always floored when I use this and I've been able to go back to doing my nails before bed (No more blanket dents). 

I bought this and lost it a few weeks later.  I looked for a week or two and then just got another one even though I wanted to wait longer because it's expensive for me (about $9).  I just couldn't stand doing my nails without it any more.

I don't find it to be the glossiest finish, not wet looking which I would prefer, but it's perfect in every other way.

I love this color.  Even though it looks like flat grey in the bottle it's really a light seafoam green color that once on your nails makes them look lit from within.  

It probably looked great next to tans this last summer, but I wouldn't know about that. 

I got this at the beginning of the summer when I was looking for a Bubblegum pink color.  The Wild Shine line is 99 ¢ but here's the thing: LOVE the color, hate the formula.  

I even bought a second bottle thinking it might have been the bottle but nope, same application problems.  It seems like it will go on well, it's not thick or gloppy but I had to work with it a lot.  It doesn't go on even and doesn't 'spread' well.  

 The reason I'm still using it is because I bought about 8 bottles of similar pinks from other brands (more expensive) and none of them were as Bubble-gummy as this one.  When push comes to shove I just love this color.

The color swatch here makes it look like a cotton candy pink but it's not.  The color is a pinky-tan cream and it's a very nice neutral.  e.l.f. has a lot of similar colors that I like but this one has warmer undertones and  it doesn't suck the color out of my skin.  

A good nudes is hard to find and individual.  For someone who needs a warm nude give this a try, they are only $2.00.  

Something to note about e.l.f. polishes - I dropped a clear (Thank the nail polish Gods) on my wood floor and the bottle broke apart into.... pieces.  I've dropped bottles before and never had one break like that.

I wiped up what I could.  Being that I have wood laminate and it was clear I didn't want to use remover because I thought I'd wreck the floor.  Unfortunately, you can see there's polish still there if you look at the floor right.   Like I said, thank the nail polish Gods it was a clear bottle that broke.   

I'm going to suggest taking a lot of care when using e.l.f. polish and to e.l.f. - I hope they get better bottleage.

This is a pretty amazing color, a black base with small teal glitter.  The overall effect is dark plus teal.  I really like a lot of the Sinful Colors and I've never had formula issues.  They run about Two Dollars, the color choices are brilliant and they are readily available.  

These polishes are flat out fun!

This color is from Wet n' Wilds Megalast line and I have a few of these colors.  I like the formula quite a lot on all of them unlike the Wild Shine line.    The polish is a great color even though the swatch makes it look like a standard shimmery red, not so.  There are tons of blood-red shimmers in a clear black base.  

When I was looking for something like this, I bought 4 polishes - This is the only one I kept.  

If you want to add more red glitz something like Orly Star Spangled looks very Va-Va-Va-Vooom over this! Ahhh-mazing!

These are new and like nothing I've ever tried.  Facets of Fuchsia and Starry Pink are the ones I have.   There is a ton of multi-sized glitters in these (gel?) polishes and you don't need three thousand coats before you end up with more then three flecks of glitter.   You will be amazed after the first coat,  you'll want more but you'll be impressed after the first.  

Starry pink is a much softer color then shown, a light milky blue-based pink and it's on my toes at the moment.  Most people are ga-ga over the purple one and I get why but honestly, I've never seen a color like the pink before.  

This one doesn't look much like the swatch, in a good way.  The base is a metallic dark grey, and it contains holographic multi-colored glitter. There are a lot of glittery silvers around but not with colorful pops that come out when the light hits it.  Nailfabutastic!

When my search for China Glaze For Audrey didn't pan out I got this one and I love that Orly sells minis.  They aren't cheap especially but I feel like I'm not wasting so much polish when I buy them.   This is one of the Tiffany Blue polishes out there (there are a lot) and I like it very much.  

It went on well but did need at least two, three was better, coats.  I love this color because every time I look at it - I smile.

That's it for now but please tell me your favorites, there's never a bad day to buy nail polish!


Greyhound Rescue

I went to a Greyhound Event over the weekend and wow, standing in a sea of waist-level noses was amazing although for Ventura it was more about a sea of  nose-level dog butts.  Which is why there are no pictures.

Amazing time and I bought a few things to support Greyhound Friends of NJ; a 2012 calendar (Greyhound's of course), a T-shirt for Ben, and some homemade dog cookies for Ginger. Oh! How she loved the cannolis!

And this... 
NorthStar vets Doody Bags

 It's a doody bag dispenser and check out where the bags come out.... It was provided by (of all places!) NorthStar Vets!   Remember them? That's where I took Taz when she was so sick a few weeks ago and where I'm taking Ventura for physical therapy soon.

I commented on the bag dispenser at NorthStar's Facebook page and they told me it's called The NorthStar Poopanion!! 

So yes,  I decided to take Ventura for the PT evaluation.  Right after he had one of the pins removed from his leg he seemed so much better, and kept getting better.  But then he started getting much more limpy and hoppy again.

At first I thought it was the cold weather and then I realized duh, of course he was better; he'd been on anti-inflammatory medication several weeks post-op.  The effects gradually wore off and now his walk is back to,  well -He will walk on his right back leg going very slow but other then that, it's up.

Greyhound Friends of NJ is one of the Rescue Organizations that take special needs dogs.  Many places won't take ex-racers, like Ventura, requiring medical treatment that can run into the thousands (Ventura's did).

Greyhound Friends of NJ maintains of list of available greyhounds (here), this is Ventura's info page (when he had an info page that is...)

Images are clickable to enlarge)

Take a look at the beautiful greyhounds on the site, read their stories and consider giving them a home with a nice, soft bed.

and maybe a friend...



Monday, October 17, 2011

e.l.f. THREE DOLLAR Favorites for October 2011

Continuing my favorites theme from Saturday; these are my current $3 e.l.f. Beeeffeff's...

I talked about my favorite dollar products on Saturday and one of those was a lip plumper (here) too.  If push came to shove I'd rank that one #2 and this one my favorite lip plumper - Ever.  There is a primer on the other side but if I'm being honest, I've never used it.  It could be fabulous, just dunno!  

e.l.f. describes it this way: The cinnamon scented Plumper enhances your lips with a subtle plumping tingle effect for fuller, larger looking lips. But there's more, my lips rosy up after using this and the color is fabulous.  A lot of times I don't follow this with anything; I like the effect so much.

As an aside, cinnamon wouldn't be my pick as a flavor but I'll keep using this as long as they make it because the effect is fabutastic!

I've purchased a second one so I can keep one in my purse.

I have several colors but the color that's my favorite is Raspberry Truffle.  For people with green eyes or people who wish to bring out green in hazel or brown eyes it helps to use and eye shadow with green's complimentary color, red.  

Not that most people can wear red shadow.  The best option for me has been warm browns but this one seems to have an extra something-something of red without screaming pink-eye and it brings out the green in a magical way.

I hope they never discontinue this one.

To follow up on green eye thing a bit...  My skins pretty fair and bronzers tend to look silly and over made up on me but this combination is very nice compact (with a huge mirror) to keep in my purse for touch ups.  The blush (which is less pink then it looks here) makes a great touch up blush and the bronzer I use as an eye shadow.  

The colors are a bit glowy without being glittery so they work on my old face (read: I don't look like an aging disco ball).  I normally use a more pink blush-like pink blush color so this just refreshes my look for touch ups and the compact, since I use it for eye shadow keeps me from having to carry too many products.

There are a few blush pinks around but the one I like from e.l.f. is called pink passion. The package is small (unlike some of the other brands) so it's a good one to carry around for touch-ups.  Definitely bright and cheerful and might be too much for some people so check out the other colors.  

I like these and am about to order another, the site says they are soft and soothing but I found them to less soft then my drug store brand - And that is precisely what I like about them.  It feels like some exfoliation is going on, unlike the five or so brands I've tried before.  My skin texture feels better to me after using the first package.

They say they take off waterproof mascara but, hm...  I think that would depend on how much you're willing to scrub so I pass on that.  

They might be too much for some people with very sensitive skin but I think these are great.

There are several colors but I love the color  Natural because it is...  And there is a blending brush on the other end.  I've worn this a bunch of times and I have only happy thoughts about this. The product goes on nicely but it's not too-too soft (where it oozes all over) and the finish is very nice.  

On me it's a very natural 'lip' color so I can add something over it or not.  The brush on the other end is great and if I blend it out I can just wear this and it doesn't look like that horrid brown lip liner some people wear...  This is the perfect purse item because you can carry it and nothing else if you want.  

I wear this alone, over powder and I bring it with me as part of my touch up kit.  It works great as an all over powder on people with light skin and its very soft feeling on.  I love this much more then I ever thought I would.  

I've tried similar products from a few brands and found they gave me a strange other-worldly hue, and not in a magical way.  More like I was channeling Lily Munster.  I like this powder, I wear it a lot.

I have a few more products I want to add, ones that didn't fit into the dollar or three dollar category but I've become a huge fan of e.l.f. in the last six months and find I use more and more of their products, daily.  

I'd love to hear your favorites because if there's a great product I need to try, I want to know! 


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