The Crazy Suburban Mom: 2010-11-07

Friday, November 12, 2010

The story of the canned ham

I want to post something about chicken today but first you have to see this because I can't retain this memory alone.  But first the back story - No wait, first a picture.


Now the back story.

My kid ate baloney sandwiches his whole life. Everyday for school the same thing; Boar's head low salt baloney on white bread, no crusts and no anything else.  Every day.  

Until high school when they served pizza.


One day (maybe a year ago) he told me he ate a ham sandwich and, It's good, Ma can we get ham?  And I just said, Sure, Hon and left out the part about the ham in the fridge like a million times and didn't he remember Iron Chef Baloney?

* Iron Chef Baloney took place about (maybe) 6th grade when a fiasco of major baloney occurred.  The only store that sold Boar's Head, stopped.  Leaving him with crust-less white bread for lunch.  I scrambled to buy a few slices of every lunch meat known to man (and yes, many many hams...) and crossed my fingers.  While he was a trooper and gave them all a shot - There was no winner to Iron Chef Baloney.  There was much drama, gagging and sink spitting but alas,  no winner.  And I have the video, by the way....*

Of course - now he likes ham.  Now that I don't have to make him lunch.  Plain ham, the plainest.  Just the boiled stuff, sliced really thin.  It's usually really inexpensive because it's one of those things that delis use as loss-leaders (I think).

Yesterday I was at the A&P and the sale price (THE SALE PRICE!)  was (give me a break) $4.99.   And I know, in the grand scheme of things and considering my deodorant is about $100 a pound - that's not much but honestly.  It should be at least a dollar less on sale.  Period.  So I just walk away and go on with my list.

In the meat department I see a three pound canned ham that is about three dollars a pound.  I've never bought a canned ham.  But you know they look an awful lot like the hams deli guys slice and I think, how bad could it be, right?


And oh, the frivolity that ensued.

Ha! Ha! Ha! Mommy made a block for dinner... and there was much discussion about what it looked like and what it might taste like not that anyone would.  

I did.  And it was surprisingly unhammy.  I said, Sort of a cross between kielbasa, baloney, hot dogs and corned beef - but shreddier- and it might be good with mustard.   Everyone stared at me for a second, let out a collective - EW! and then voted for Chinese Take Out.


I was going to post a chicken recipe but think I lost my appetite.


Thursday, November 11, 2010

The inevitable result of blogging about your kids...

Smiling Ben

I write about my kid on this blog.


Before I hit the publish button I always show him the post and ask, Is this okay with you?  In retrospect doing so was really, really fortuitous.


To all you moms who blog about your kids and wonder what they will do when they get older...This...    The Chair Fort   ....Is what they will do cause yep, after watching you blog for years they got the whole blogging thing, by osmosis.  I think.


Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Retro Tuesday on Wednesday and the art of feminine finesse...

It's Retro Tuesday but Wednesday and I wanted to do a makeup thing but no, no, no, don't go yet if you hate make up....  About a year ago I found this personalized Beauty Analysis someone had sent away for probably sixty plus years ago, at a garage sale.  I  found some other (probably professional salon) stuff I totally coveted but when push came to shove the woman couldn't part with it and felt so bad she gave me the personalized Beauty Analysis for free.

larger images of all if you click

The analysis is pages (and pages) long - reams of yellowed, typed - and I mean individually typed by a living breathing person typed.  From the looks of the intro page someone could take a course (monthly lessons) to achieve "an individual and even more attractive you."


The analysis isn't dated and the only thing I could find out about Renee Long is that she wrote a book published in 1939 called  Style Your Personality: The Art of Feminine Finesse.  Dating what I have is a bit difficult and at first I thought it was fifties or sixties but looking through it again, I'm sure it's much older.  

She refers to Constance Bennett and Carole Lombard as examples of "Square Face Types" and Carole Lombard was dead by 1942.  Constance Bennett lived much longer but I think her hey-day was the forties and back... 


It's an interesting bit of life/beauty info about back then.  Seems what woman did to look lovelier involved sucking it in.  Mostly. 

Foundations were the bomb and Yo, does this girdle make my ass look fat?  Was the question on everyone's hips.  Err, lips.

And minimizing minimizing minimizing...  So basically things (make that women) haven't changed all that much.

And go check out my Retro Tuesday friend Miss V at Vonlipi's Favorites - She  truly ebodies the art of feminine finesse and has a wicked way with Pyrex... like nobodies business...


Tuesday, November 9, 2010

I'm loving cold cream...

I need a break from painting the bathroom.  So. Bad.   I thought I'd do a post about make-up - well, skin care - again, because my buying frenzy has sort of calmed down and my skin has calmed down too.

Over the last year or so I really tried a lot of products above and beyond the Retin-A.  When I told my dermatologist I was still breaking out she gave me a stronger dose and I still had as she calls it, break through.

I didn't ask for anything stronger still because my insurance company has decided they don't pay for 'skin' issues anymore.  Okay, well they pay for some;  contagious, fulminating, oozing pustules they pay for. But they decided that acne - even acne in a woman at the age some woman are wearing Depends - isn't important to deal with.

So left to my own devices I tried a barrage of OTC teenage acne products which my skin viewed as harsh.

No.  Not harsh.   More like this.

Instead of the desired effect.  Peeling the acne (and probably attached skin) off my face it made the whole situation  atomically worse;  my skin got so dry, it flaked worse then it already was.  But I was afraid to moisturize because I'd break out.  More then I already was... 

The whole situation was pretty much an ugly mess of flaky dry acne  that I couldn't even cover because the only thing that looked worse then my skin was my skin covered with peeling makeup.

I don't even know what made me try cold cream - it made no sense to try it but I think I was just out of things to try and cold cream was all that was left.  Pond's Cold Cream is really cheap - like five bucks on sale.  And it really has a vintage appeal (not that that would be enough if I kept breaking out like a fifteen year old...)

And in a week's time I wasn't breaking out and in less time my skin is all calm and smooth.  I looked on line and I'm far from the only one who has had this experience. 

I'm also using the Pond's Dry Skin Cream which is also cheap in comparison to just about every thing else out there...  about five bucks on sale too. 

And before anyone says anything - I've read the ingredients I know what's in it and it's not clogging anything.  My face is clearer then it's been in, man.  I don't know. And I've been a Retin-A user for years and I'm still using it  but adding Pond's seems to have tipped me over some good skin line. Plus now my skin is calm.

Maybe my skin was breaking out because it was irritated (although it broke out before I nuked it), some people have that problem.  I waited weeks to write about it because I didn't want to Yay! too soon and I also tried the generic CVS brand but nope - it's the Pond's brand cold cream making a difference for me.

Can't explain it but really love it.

*Bought this myself - it's not a review review.  I just love it...*


Monday, November 8, 2010

Aside from the crazy germ thing the floor looks fab

The floor is in and I've finally bathed.  The bathing a much bigger story.  Friday I realized I'd not since Tuesday - For real.  Given the choice of bathing in what is now the toilet tub...


...or showering in the stall shower next to the toilet tub or in my son's bathroom - I finally caved and showered in my son's bathroom.

It was a very long week-end of cleaning the toilet tub, cleaning the bathroom in general from the tile install, cleaning the toilet tub again, swatching the paint samples, cleaning the toilet tub, spackling stuff I missed on the first go around, (cleaning the toilet tub again), going over the paint samples in different lights...  (cleaning the toilet tub with something else), buying a different gray from the originals because the originals were too dark, (do I have to saying I cleaned the tub again, because I did)....  and the result was...


I love Martha Stewart's Sea Glass but on the wall it's greener than aquaier, and I wanted it to fall on the aquaier side.  And the two grays I thought I would use turned out too dark and the one I thought would be too light and silvery - Heavy Goose - turned out great.  So I'm very glad I got samples at Home Depot ($2.49 a piece well worth spending and you can order them online from Home Depot here)  The pics are only as good as Internet pics are going to be, but they are something and pretty representational in general.

Now my main problem - aside from that insane germ issue - is that I really, really love the thought of painting an aqua color but when push comes to shove that gray color will look great with the tiles.


And I will probably end up painting the bathroom gray.  Except maybe the the back wall behind the the toilet tub and the one behind the shower - making them accent walls.  If I can find a color I like.  

Otherwise I might make aqua and accent color.  But I don't even know anymore so what do y'all think?


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