The Crazy Suburban Mom: Karma in the 21st century or Why it's a bad idea to be a giant doody face...

Thursday, July 8, 2010

Karma in the 21st century or Why it's a bad idea to be a giant doody face...

For hundreds of years Karma was something that you didn't have to worry about until your next run around the block but in the 21st century it's entirely different.

I know because I've done an exhaustive study from my front-lawn facing powder room. That toilet is parked in front of a window where I watch the whole world go by.  Seated you, okay I, can watch the comings and goings of many things, in the case of Karma -  Appliance repair trucks.

A week ago Thursday I conducted another study because there weren't any new magazines. I opened a slat and did a quick howdy-do of the neighborhood and  there was an appliance repair truck at that house again.  The house with the neighbors who can't get along and for whom everything is an issue.

Parking, except parking their cars - is an issue. Dog doody, except their dog's doody - Is an issue.  Kids are an issue.  Decorative flags, garbage, noise, shoes on the front porch, well..  I could go on but everyone has a neighbor like this.

I've studied this appliance truck  phenomena and there have been more repair trucks at that house in the last 14 years than any other house. And I while I still have my original water heater, dishwasher, microwave, fridge, and dryer; they have had to replace theirs.

I know because I can see the deliveries from the comfort of my toilet.

This happens too much to be random and has to be the 21st century version of reaping what you sow. Sort of a cosmic thump on the head to say, hey! You've spent your life so far making other people miserable and being a general nuisance; you're about to spend the rest on a first name basis with every repair guy in the twenty mile radius.  Hundreds of years ago if you weren't a good person you would come back as something unpleasant.  But today you get bad appliance karma.

So neighbor, while you spend your time looking for things to nick-pick about we bide our time. We are very patient. We know that for every ridiculous request you make, every outburst you have, and every time you make a giant doody face out of yourself  it brings us one step closer to the day we can all pull up some lawn chairs and watch the install of your new central air.

Until then the neighborhood makes do watching the appliance repair truck parade and we giggle a righteous giggle.


Jesser 7/8/10, 11:39 AM  

LOL. That is hilarious. I love it! We were driving thru KS once and had almost reached the "toll plaza" when a beeyotch in a bright red sportscar zoomed up and cut in front of us. As she was paying her toll, a state trooper walked over from the next booth and had a chat with her. She was pulled over, receiving her ticket as we were pulling away from the toll booth. INSTANT KARMA! And she didn't catch up to us for almost 2 hours! My mom sums it up as "You get back from the world what you put into it!"

Maureen 7/8/10, 11:53 AM  

Yup. You reap what you sow.

3 Including Me... 7/8/10, 1:02 PM  

I love you said in your title... DOODY FACE! ha ha ha ha!

Cassie 7/8/10, 1:50 PM  

Your neighbor sounds horrible! I truly do believe in should keep us all on our toes!

Window On The Prairie 7/8/10, 2:50 PM  

Well, I have to say I don't have a neighbor like that - our nearest neighbor is about a mile away, and we can't see him- even better, he can't see us. But I do sympathize.

William K Wallace 7/8/10, 4:19 PM  

Karma does exist, whether you believe it or not. I'm sure we have all had it catch us all at some point and those that are smart learn from it..!

Adi 7/8/10, 5:09 PM  

karma sometimes become part of our lives

Rachel (Two Healthy Plates) 7/8/10, 5:35 PM  

Hey, thanks for stopping by and commenting on my blog! I loved your post, it was a great pick me up laugh when I was reading at work! Shh! I know a thing or two about cranky neighbors but I've never heard of neighbors having a problem with shoes on the porch! That's crazy.

HiPnCooLMoMMa 7/8/10, 9:55 PM  

my oh my, such a pain to have a neighbor like that. hope karma gets listed into their vocabulary.

Christy 7/9/10, 8:44 AM  

Your posts always crack me up. You are a fantastic writer, albeit quite casual, but that is why I like your blog so much!

Pamela 7/9/10, 10:26 AM  

doody face, huh? I wish you'd posted a photo. heh heh heh!

Anonymous,  7/9/10, 11:09 AM  

Thanks for your comment on my blog; glad I came over! What a hilarious article; I never quite thought of it that way. I will now be on alert for appliance trucks and where they go...

Anonymous,  7/9/10, 11:42 AM  

We have neighbors much like that--they called our school district so often to complain about the school bus ruining our private road this winter, so the district (temporarily) refused to pick up on our street. We had to walk the kids, some only 5 years old, a mile in the snow to the bus stop. The furnace repair truck soon showed up at their house.

Jannie Funster 7/9/10, 12:50 PM  

Oh, gee are you on septic or sewer? Septics can cost $20,000 and prbably higher.

Okay -- what intriques me most is the decorative flags? What kind? Like those pennants car dealers have? What?

Now, I do admit to not always having been The Model Neighbor as our 17-year remodel has unfolded, but I have kept the shoes inside the door! :)

Thanks for popping into my blog. Your comment has been "attended to" over there. :)

I LOVE bloggingk but as my blog gets bigger and bigger I regret not having time to read every post of every one of my buds, but I do get around to read and comment when I can.

Thanks! We're buds now so...


Tes 7/9/10, 1:44 PM  

Doody face! :)
I do really beleive in Karma, too.
I enjoyed reading the ost so much. I'm so happy I found your blog.
Have a nice weekend,

Lisa B. 7/9/10, 1:57 PM  

And if I know karma, the central air will go out on one of those 103 degrees days you're having... or it might wait a few months until it's -15 below and the system will only blow cold then!

Great post!

Theres just life 7/9/10, 6:01 PM  

I really enjoyed you blog. You have a crazy outlook on life. We share that...are we related. Like I always said to get through this life with out going crazy you can either laugh or cry. And crying leaves your eyes puffy and nose red.

Beth 7/10/10, 4:12 AM  

Holy cow, if my neighbors complained about crap on my porch/yard they would just have to deal with it. Things just don't work that way in Alaska. Live and let live. Your property is your property and you can basically do whatever you want with it. There are some subdivisions with home owners associations that are more strict, but they are definitely the exception, not the rule!
I'm glad you got to watch a little karma in action ;)

sandy petals 7/10/10, 10:53 PM  

I loved this post! It is so awesome. Yep, my neighbor like that lives behind me. LOL

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