The Crazy Suburban Mom: I'm getting a motorcycle...

Friday, June 25, 2010

I'm getting a motorcycle...

In an effort to balance that kids are annoying, and because it's more fun than a day at the spa, I keep telling my son, "I’m getting a motorcycle."  

In an alternate dimension defined by too much eye-liner and tight leather pants (without feeling like a pile of Jimmy Deans)  I did have a motorcycle.  The bike is long gone but I clung to the pants by renewing the license.

  I may be comfortably settled into a minivan - And thanks to gravity; it's all pretty much settled, but that doesn’t mean I’m not the same person who owned the open road all those fourscore and never mind years ago. And since I still have my license the state of New Jersey considers me perfectly capable of straddling another monster and driving the suburban mean streets.

And they are really, really mean.


We’re talking New Jersey here; Route 22. Traffic Circles.  

Anyway, my kid was all, Really? And I was all, yeah.  And he was seriously ready to call me, Dude! and fist bump me some love when he realized  I was talking about a Barbie-pink Vespa and having Hello Kitty painted on the side. In one shake of Hello Kitty's tail I was mom again and so not Dude! and he left the room afraid I would actually do it and identify myself as his mom while driving through town on a pastel Vespa.

Which I totally would.

I dropped my fantasy figuring  the only thing more pathetic than a woman stuffed in black leather on a motorcycle trying to recapture her youth was a woman stuffed in black leather on a  Hello Kitty scooter. Period.

 But whenever I'm feeling it, I haul out the dream of popping me some Hello Kitty wheelies past Bernards High to annoy my kid. And even though I'm kidding, the kid sweats bullets.

Giant Hello Kitty shaped bullets.


Maureen 6/25/10, 11:45 AM  

My guess is that 'mortified' would accurately describe his reaction. lol

Mimi 6/25/10, 2:56 PM  

Do it, do it, DO IT!!!!! You would totally be my hero!

Janiss 6/25/10, 7:48 PM  

I totally adore the idea of a pink Hello Kitty Vespa! I don't drive motorcycles, but if I did, that is exactly what I would buy.

BTW, just hinting about actually going out and doing it is a good way to keep the kid on his toes, I think!

Babes Mami 6/25/10, 10:05 PM  

I'm going to need you do it, Kitty or Leather...leather kitty...DO IT!!!

Lin 6/25/10, 10:35 PM  

I would LOVE you on a Vespa!! Photos, please!

When I was in high school, we needed a second car because we had 3 drivers and 3 or 4 jobs between us. Since my brother would have been the primary on a second car, it was just too expensive to afford the insurance and we just couldn't do it. Soooooo, my mother bought a little Yamaha 125 Enduro motorcycle to putt around on. Yeah/no.

She worked at a grade school that had the mascot of a little devil, so she would ride that stupid thing to work with her "Dosher Demons" coat on--I swear just to cause me total embarrassment. I could have died when she'd come to the high school to pick me up on that thing. Ugh.

Scarred for life. Please don't do that to your child. Please.

imelda 6/26/10, 2:31 AM  

yes do it!

Ruth 6/26/10, 8:46 AM  

What a cool idea! I'd love to do this sort of thing myself, but I'd probably go for a Harry Potter themed touring bike, red and yellow (Gryffindor, of course!) with a couple Firebolts painted on the gas tank.....

Gotta get the license first though.

Storm, The Psychotic Housewife 6/26/10, 5:35 PM  

Oh, we totally have the same threat - I keep telling my DH that is EXACTLY what I want. He has visions of pepto pink, and he wants nothing to do with it. LOL

I'd be hot.

lina 6/27/10, 3:09 AM  

I keep dreaming of owning and riding one too! And mortify both DH & Son by doing so...

Ah, youth. It's long gone now. :D

The Coupon Goddess 6/29/10, 8:41 AM  

I think I broke a rib laughing over the scooter. At the least I snorted hot coffee out of my nose.

One day my son was cruising through my ipod and he said "part of my soul has died". "Why?" I asked. "Because I think I'm going to ask to link our ipod libraries, you listen to cool stuff" Score one for mom. I knew my Metallica,Pink Floyd loving ways would serve me well at some point.

The Crazy Suburban Mom 6/29/10, 8:59 AM  

The coupon Goddess - Its so funny. When he was thinking 'Harley Davidson' my street cred was through the roof and then - well, you can imagine.

But yeah, its really funny how odd little things like this make them happy and horrified at the same time


jan 7/2/10, 5:56 PM  

go for it!!!! I came here to enter the Novica giveaway, but you're so fun, I'm sticking around, giveaways or not. LOVE your style. Go for the bike-your kid'll get over it :)

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